I feel horribly guilty whenever I get an email from Netflix. Usually it’s reminding me that I’ve only partly watched something. Usually the reason for this is because I wasn’t enjoying it enough to commit to the rest of it and went off to do something else instead (kill an O’Driscoll but get disconnected before finding any, try and get some sleep, scroll aimlessly on something that I get no joy from, etc, etc.)
However now that I know Netflix is watching, I feel like I should get the whole thing watched. Or at the very least leave it on in the background whilst I do said other things. I know it’s a marketing trick, I know it’s not REALLY trying to be helpful, I know it just wants to suck me in to make sure I stay subscribed.
But I can’t help but imagine Netflix as a sad, dilapidated CRT TV sitting in the corner begging to be watched just one more time. Like it’s reaching out and trying to make small talk in an effort to stay relevant or create some sort of a connection to cling to a world that no longer wants it.
I think we should break up, Netflix. I genuinely do. I downgraded you from the 4k option but now it’s really time that we took a long and hard look at our relationship. I just worry that if I do you, you won’t be okay and if push comes to shove, I’ll actually miss those begging emails to give you just one more chance.
And the last episode of Sunderland Til I Die might somehow be worth it, even if I know how it ends already.